Houston, we have a problem

I convinced Rob to let me borrow the dethatcher he rented today. This seemed like a good idea at the time, but the subsequent events illuminate what a huge miscalculation this was.

So as you may know, my lawn is full of moss. And dead grass. It's a thatching nightmare—the only thing not covering my lawn is live grass.

The dethatcher Rob rented uses its horrific claws of death to rip everything but grass out of my yard. Typically this sort of thing just pulls up the little bit of ground cover hiding underneath the turf, but in this case it made mountains of moss and grass at least three or four times taller than the length I cut the grass to (which is pretty long in the first place—long lawn is healthy lawn).

I spent most of the afternoon dealing with the aftermath. After filling my 96-gallon compost bin with heavily packed thatch (honestly, I'm worried the trash guys won't be able to get it out of there), I realized that this may be unrecoverable...because at that point I had only cleared a quarter of the yard.

So...this is a problem. Take a look. I estimate there are at least two more compost-bin loads of clippings there, which puts the total at nearly 300 gallons. That's a lot of moss and weeds.

I even mowed the whole mess when I was done to pick up any additional clippings lying on top of the grass, and had to unload the mower six times.

And all this? It's just the front yard. I haven't even touched the back yet.